I think you have them sexed correctly. Mine liked earthworm stick and algae wafers a lot


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Thanks mbkemp!

Any thoughts on the aggression or why the male is chasing the female all the time, is that normal or not healthy/stressful for the female?

 

I think this fish is better in a group. Even numbers. Mine fought frequently at first and then to test the hierarchy.

My females would test the male when it was a pairing decision.

If one fish is in a corner or staying high in the water then I would separate otherwise I would let them sort it out


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I sympathize with the difficulty of sexing. I have a couple of new rams in my tank, and, judging from the way they lip-lock over territory, I'm pretty sure I got two males. Adding a large piece of driftwood to "compartmentalize" the tank has reduced the competition for territory significantly.

 

Bolivian rams can be tough to sex because a lot of the tell tail signs you'll see online can actually show in both male and female. I had Bolivians one time in the past and managed to sex them correct at the time. Brought them home and acclimated them and as soon as I got them in the tank the two went to war. It was kind of late at night and I couldn't really do anything so I shut of the lights and went to bed. Starting the following morning they swam together everywhere in the tank and bred a number of times. I think you got the sexing right and my guess from the behaviour is that the male wants to breed and the female might not be ready yet.

 

Thanks guys. The female doesn't seem to be suffering or staying high in the tank, however it's sad seeing her hiding from the male all the time. Whenever he gets a glance of her he right away shoots across the tank to ram her in the corner of the tank.

Based on this YouTube video

we are now thinking of getting a third ram (hopefully a female) so two would pair up, as he says they wouldn't pair up unless there's a "third wheel" in the tank.

I don't know what's the best option:
a) keeping the two as they are,
b) rehoming one of the two or
c) getting one more (which means one still would be left out) and plus our tank is already "full house".

Thanks again!

 

I've had a bunch of these. What you're seeing there in the video as far as male and female getting along well is just one point in time. Even when they pair up that doesn't mean that it will be like that all the time. Very likely not. What I've observed with most of mine is that they'll go through regular phases. That ranges from getting along great and working together breeding and raising fry, to constant very aggressive chasing after mating, which then will tail off to generally getting along reasonably well, to then a little less aggressive chasing pre-mating. Then back around again. In fact, I probably could plot it out in regular cycles of weeks. GBRs seem to act in a similar way but I think that the Bolivian males can be a lot more aggressive. How aggressive varies with individual fish. I've had some that just don't get along with others at all. If you have enough of them to watch over time as you might when raising fry you can pick out some more or less aggressive fish but that's not something that you're going to be able to do just going out and buying some.

Best thing that you can do is give them enough room that they're not forced together and 17 gallons really is very tight for them I think. Lacking that, break up sight lines and provide plenty of cover and escape routes. If it continues to be bad then rather than adding another female, a better idea might be to try moving the male to another tank for a while if you have one and then trying to reintroduce him after some time. That's worked for me before. If not then maybe rehome the dominant male and trying a new a smaller male. But again I really think that 17 gallons is too small for two of them especially as they grow. One thing to put them together in a smaller tank to get them to breed. That works well. But another to force them to live together all the time that close.

 

@Mike A. got it right on the money, based on my personal experience.

I find Bolivian to be a lot more territorial then almost any other cichlids I've kept. Each fish got to stake out its own little slice of paradise.

Don't feel bad - a lot depends on each fish individual personality. To cheer you up, here is my current situation. I have a single male in a 3' 50g who has been a widower for about 6 months. Projecting human emotions on fish, I felt sorry for him and got 3 young girls to keep him company. I introduced them late at night and the 3 newcomers spent the next hour dividing up the tank - into the 3 parts, all territories bordering the front glass. The male, who has been the tank boss, always front and center, is now spending most of his time hiding under a crypt in the back corner. So much for brighting up his day.

I still remember my first Bolivians. A couple in a 4' 65g where they were the largest fish. They had multiple spawns but every morning they started the day with a fight. Every single day. Some human families are just like that.

 

They really are kind of tricky fish to try to have together in whatever combinations. The big male that I have now started out as a subordinate fish that was picked on by all of the others including females. One day he finally realized that he'd grown bigger than the rest and said screw that noise and turned into an absolute terror. Male, female, didn't matter. I couldn't have any others in the tank with him. Ridiculously aggressive. Couldn't even get any in the tank since he'd violently attack the bags when trying to float fish or would be slamming against the glass if I had them in one of the plastic hang-on containers. Put them in the tank and he was just relentless.

Finally pulled him out and put him in time out for a while as the only ram in another tank. The female that I have with him with gets along with any. Never any problems at all no matter what the combination. Moved her in and then him back in after a month or so and they've been fine (for the most part anyway beyond normal chasing as above and some routine feeding squabbles). Other males that I've had were OK together. Other females together, nothing but continuing battles. *shrug* Best way to approach them I think is try it, don't count on anything, and be prepared to change up as necessary.