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Bookmarked this a while back when I had the same question. The rays on the fins are sometimes very hard to see and not always easy to do (or even possible on some colors) but the rays on the fins should usually tell you what type she is.
http://www.fishforums.net/index.php?/topic/183603-figuring-out-your-females-tail-type/
http://www.fishforums.net/index.php?/topic/183603-figuring-out-your-females-tail-type/