I know you have truly been there & done that. The give away - "Poo started to smell like money." I've got a lot of respect for 'road warriors' (a tough career loaded with many challenges, and definitely not for the faint of heart).
It's amazing to see what gets trapped in the screening systems of treatment plants throughout the country. I've seen $100 bills, various critters (aquatic & terrestrial), plants (a lot of aquatic plants), illegal drugs, body parts... to name a few, and the list goes on.
I like the quote about finding money: "It's got to have at least one zero on it before I go in for it, preferably two."
Can you imagine what the "Kentucky monster" would do to a planted tank, in very short work? I don't think any cichlids would be picking it off for a snack.