HELP!!!! She said no to 100gal child. (she it was to long)

familyman03 · 07-12-2010, 05:56 AM

I am getting my old 100 gallon tank back from my brother and my wife says i can't set it up. what are some sell point or advice wether stupid, insane, unsure, etc.... I would really love to have this tank but if she continues to say no I am going to cut it in half and make it a two and half foot fifty gallon.

heeeeeeellllllllllpppppp please
jason

**xmas_one** · 07-12-2010, 05:58 AM

4x2x2...120 gallon..

OverStocked · 07-12-2010, 06:56 AM

Can't cut it, as I've pointed out already in your other thread.

Have you had a rational discussion as to WHY she doesn't want you to set it up? Is it about money? Space? time?

If it is about space, have you considered other spots to put the tank? Basement? Extra room, garage?

If about money, show her it can be done economically. Use a diy sump as filter or sunsun filters like I use, and cheaper lights like I use. Use sand or gravel instead of an expensive substrate, and purchase things over several months. Make SACRIFICES in other areas to show you're serious. I literally add aquariums to my budget without ADDING a cent to overall expense. That means I cut corners on some things to get there...

You know your wife. You know whether this is a futile effort or if you will be able to "get what you want". If your marriage is about lying, deceiving, and fighting to get what you want, I suggest you spend less time trying to get this tank in your house and more time looking for a marriage counselor. I don't think I'd ever tolerate a relationship that either of us had any absolute say on anything. My wife and I are a team and believe that if it is something the other person wants it at least merits a discussion.

If she has a valid reason and you're just not seeing it, talking about it is the best solution. If she is just saying no to say no, well... you married her... you deal with it!

Postal Penguin · 07-12-2010, 10:57 AM

Ask her for the specific reason and then counter those reasons with your plan. If its money, make a budget and show how it can be done for cheap. If its space, explain and show how tanks can become a centerpiece decoration in a living room. If she is saying no, to say no then you'll have to deal with that.

Craigthor · 07-12-2010, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by over_stocked

Can't cut it, as I've pointed out already in your other thread.

Have you had a rational discussion as to WHY she doesn't want you to set it up? Is it about money? Space? time?

If it is about space, have you considered other spots to put the tank? Basement? Extra room, garage?

If about money, show her it can be done economically. Use a diy sump as filter or sunsun filters like I use, and cheaper lights like I use. Use sand or gravel instead of an expensive substrate, and purchase things over several months. Make SACRIFICES in other areas to show you're serious. I literally add aquariums to my budget without ADDING a cent to overall expense. That means I cut corners on some things to get there...

You know your wife. You know whether this is a futile effort or if you will be able to "get what you want". If your marriage is about lying, deceiving, and fighting to get what you want, I suggest you spend less time trying to get this tank in your house and more time looking for a marriage counselor. I don't think I'd ever tolerate a relationship that either of us had any absolute say on anything. My wife and I are a team and believe that if it is something the other person wants it at least merits a discussion.

If she has a valid reason and you're just not seeing it, talking about it is the best solution. If she is just saying no to say no, well... you married her... you deal with it!

That or jsut set it up while she is out for a girls night out and act like it was always there. Just remember it is easier to ask forgiveness then to ask permission, note this doesn't work on all wives mine included but if you want other ideas there is my 2 cents.

Craig

jinx© · 07-12-2010, 11:57 AM

Tell her if she allows you to set it up that she can one day bury you in it.<shrugs>

sajata · 07-12-2010, 12:03 PM

how many of the respondents are married?

familyman03, i suggest you take up nano tanks in your office at work...

Chasintrades · 07-12-2010, 12:49 PM

its either the fish or the kids.... either way you are swimming with the sharks.

F22 · 07-12-2010, 01:08 PM

Make a trade, tell her if you can have the tank you will take her to one of those home and garden shows.

Haha

OverStocked · 07-12-2010, 02:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by F22

Make a trade, tell her if you can have the tank you will take her to one of those home and garden shows.

Haha

The words of a not yet married man. Take not e quick! To get something big, you have to give something BIGGER.

Going to those home and garden shows is more likely going to be something she could care less about... Most of them are oriented towards guys now.

hbosman · 07-12-2010, 02:26 PM

You might be able to convince her that a bought and paid for 100 gallon is better than spending the cost of a 120 gallon. Especially... if you pretend that you would rather have the 120. :-)

Kathyy · 07-12-2010, 02:40 PM

My 100 gallon five foot long tank sits on one short wall of the living room with the fireplace opposite. It is centered with house plants at either end. The floor is tile. There is a faucet and door handy for water changes. NOW it is very quiet with electronic ballasts and the sump is cooperating at the moment. The lights are shielded so there isn't a glare and are on when we need light in the room.

I live in a tiny house and didn't put up a tank for 15 years. A family member loaned us a piano and I found room for that so when the piano went back I got a fish tank the same size as that piano!

Unless I had a tile floor on a slab foundation and can place the tank so it is integrated into the room I would not want a tank this large. If I had rambunctious kids throwing things and jumping over furniture I would probably not want to deal with a tank anywhere near a traffic area. Unless I could buy bits over time and have storage for those bits I wouldn't want to start a project this big. I needed to add an outlets for my lights, be sure you have enough capacity!

I wouldn't set it up on the sly but why not put it in storage and start collecting bits on the cheap? Mineralized top soil stores well and costs a couple bucks, right? Craig's List for filters, lights, the all important water change gear and decor. None of those are big tank dedicated, well maybe the lights. Draw little pictures of how you are putting the tank in the room. Plan your plantings and fish list. Wait and be patient. Me nagging that I NEEDED the freezer for dog food got me a stone wall. Me waiting worked, got my freezer for my birthday a year ago. Okay it took a year but I got it!

**xmas_one** · 07-12-2010, 02:49 PM

Here's a true story, I hope it inspires you...

An Icelandic fishing captain, known as "the Iceman" for his tough character, grabbed a 300 kg shark with his bare hands as it swam in shallow water towards his crew, a witness said today.

The skipper of the trawler "Erik the Red" was on a beach in Kuummiit, east Greenland, watching his crew processing a catch when he saw the shark swimming towards the fish blood and guts - and his men.

Captain Sigurdur Petursson, known to locals as "the Iceman", ran into the shallow water and grabbed the shark by its tail. He dragged it off to dry land and killed it with his knife.

"He caught it just with his hands. There was a lot of blood in the sea and the shark came in and he thought it was dangerous," Frede Kilime, a hunter and fisherman who watched from the beach, told Reuters by phone from Greenland.

Icelandic author and journalist Reynir Traustason, who knows the trawler captain, said the act was typical of the man.

"He's called 'the Iceman' because he isn't scared of anything," he said. "I know the people in that part of the world. They are really tough."

Noahma · 07-12-2010, 03:00 PM

I agree with the other married folks in here. I would not try to pull a fast one on her and set it up, as a couple others suggested lol. Ask for her exact reasoning, and maybe do a mock setup. These tanks usually look bigger when they are not in the environment they intend to stay in. Cutting the tank is going to be disastrous. The bottom of that size of a tank is Tempered, which will end with the bottom shattering into a million little cubes when cut. And tempered glass is quite a bit more expensive than non tempered glass. You might be able to sell that tank and replace it with a couple smaller ones.

jmhart · 07-12-2010, 03:04 PM

I agree with everything O_S said.

07-12-2010, 05:56 AM	#1
familyman03 Planted Tank Obsessed (View User Tanks) PTrader: (0/0%) Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Bakersfield, CA Posts: 308	HELP!!!! She said no to 100gal child. (she it was to long) I am getting my old 100 gallon tank back from my brother and my wife says i can't set it up. what are some sell point or advice wether stupid, insane, unsure, etc.... I would really love to have this tank but if she continues to say no I am going to cut it in half and make it a two and half foot fifty gallon. heeeeeeellllllllllpppppp please jason

07-12-2010, 11:57 AM	#6
jinx© Wannabe Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (6/100%) Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Sacramento, CA Posts: 1,545	Tell her if she allows you to set it up that she can one day bury you in it.<shrugs> __________________

07-12-2010, 12:03 PM	#7
sajata Planted Tank Obsessed (View User Tanks) PTrader: (3/100%) Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Chester Springs, PA Posts: 305	how many of the respondents are married? familyman03, i suggest you take up nano tanks in your office at work... __________________

07-12-2010, 03:04 PM	#15
jmhart Wannabe Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (30/100%) Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Atlanta,GA Posts: 1,578	I agree with everything O_S said. __________________ 60-P Planted Journal __Methods of Algae Control__http://jeffs120.blogspot.com/

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07-12-2010, 05:58 AM	#2
xmas_one Custom User Title (View User Tanks) PTrader: (7/100%) Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Long Beach, CA Posts: 2,060	4x2x2...120 gallon..

07-12-2010, 06:56 AM	#3
OverStocked Planted Tank Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (76/94%) Join Date: May 2007 Location: SoDak Posts: 10,732	Can't cut it, as I've pointed out already in your other thread. Have you had a rational discussion as to WHY she doesn't want you to set it up? Is it about money? Space? time? If it is about space, have you considered other spots to put the tank? Basement? Extra room, garage? If about money, show her it can be done economically. Use a diy sump as filter or sunsun filters like I use, and cheaper lights like I use. Use sand or gravel instead of an expensive substrate, and purchase things over several months. Make SACRIFICES in other areas to show you're serious. I literally add aquariums to my budget without ADDING a cent to overall expense. That means I cut corners on some things to get there... You know your wife. You know whether this is a futile effort or if you will be able to "get what you want". If your marriage is about lying, deceiving, and fighting to get what you want, I suggest you spend less time trying to get this tank in your house and more time looking for a marriage counselor. I don't think I'd ever tolerate a relationship that either of us had any absolute say on anything. My wife and I are a team and believe that if it is something the other person wants it at least merits a discussion. If she has a valid reason and you're just not seeing it, talking about it is the best solution. If she is just saying no to say no, well... you married her... you deal with it!

07-12-2010, 10:57 AM	#4
Postal Penguin Planted Tank Obsessed (View User Tanks) PTrader: (6/100%) Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: CO Posts: 414	Ask her for the specific reason and then counter those reasons with your plan. If its money, make a budget and show how it can be done for cheap. If its space, explain and show how tanks can become a centerpiece decoration in a living room. If she is saying no, to say no then you'll have to deal with that.

07-12-2010, 12:49 PM	#8
Chasintrades Planted Member (View User Tanks) PTrader: (9/100%) Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: nyc Posts: 299	its either the fish or the kids.... either way you are swimming with the sharks.

07-12-2010, 01:08 PM	#9
F22 Planted Tank Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (7/100%) Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: .201. Posts: 4,344	Make a trade, tell her if you can have the tank you will take her to one of those home and garden shows. Haha

07-12-2010, 02:26 PM	#11
hbosman Wannabe Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (1/100%) Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Leesburg Virginia Posts: 1,584	You might be able to convince her that a bought and paid for 100 gallon is better than spending the cost of a 120 gallon. Especially... if you pretend that you would rather have the 120. :-)

07-12-2010, 02:40 PM	#12
Kathyy Planted Tank Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (32/100%) Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Newbury Park, CA Posts: 2,952	My 100 gallon five foot long tank sits on one short wall of the living room with the fireplace opposite. It is centered with house plants at either end. The floor is tile. There is a faucet and door handy for water changes. NOW it is very quiet with electronic ballasts and the sump is cooperating at the moment. The lights are shielded so there isn't a glare and are on when we need light in the room. I live in a tiny house and didn't put up a tank for 15 years. A family member loaned us a piano and I found room for that so when the piano went back I got a fish tank the same size as that piano! Unless I had a tile floor on a slab foundation and can place the tank so it is integrated into the room I would not want a tank this large. If I had rambunctious kids throwing things and jumping over furniture I would probably not want to deal with a tank anywhere near a traffic area. Unless I could buy bits over time and have storage for those bits I wouldn't want to start a project this big. I needed to add an outlets for my lights, be sure you have enough capacity! I wouldn't set it up on the sly but why not put it in storage and start collecting bits on the cheap? Mineralized top soil stores well and costs a couple bucks, right? Craig's List for filters, lights, the all important water change gear and decor. None of those are big tank dedicated, well maybe the lights. Draw little pictures of how you are putting the tank in the room. Plan your plantings and fish list. Wait and be patient. Me nagging that I NEEDED the freezer for dog food got me a stone wall. Me waiting worked, got my freezer for my birthday a year ago. Okay it took a year but I got it!

07-12-2010, 02:49 PM	#13
xmas_one Custom User Title (View User Tanks) PTrader: (7/100%) Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Long Beach, CA Posts: 2,060	Here's a true story, I hope it inspires you... An Icelandic fishing captain, known as "the Iceman" for his tough character, grabbed a 300 kg shark with his bare hands as it swam in shallow water towards his crew, a witness said today. The skipper of the trawler "Erik the Red" was on a beach in Kuummiit, east Greenland, watching his crew processing a catch when he saw the shark swimming towards the fish blood and guts - and his men. Captain Sigurdur Petursson, known to locals as "the Iceman", ran into the shallow water and grabbed the shark by its tail. He dragged it off to dry land and killed it with his knife. "He caught it just with his hands. There was a lot of blood in the sea and the shark came in and he thought it was dangerous," Frede Kilime, a hunter and fisherman who watched from the beach, told Reuters by phone from Greenland. Icelandic author and journalist Reynir Traustason, who knows the trawler captain, said the act was typical of the man. "He's called 'the Iceman' because he isn't scared of anything," he said. "I know the people in that part of the world. They are really tough."

07-12-2010, 03:00 PM	#14
Noahma Planted Tank Guru (View User Tanks) PTrader: (8/100%) Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Northglenn, Colorado Posts: 3,535	I agree with the other married folks in here. I would not try to pull a fast one on her and set it up, as a couple others suggested lol. Ask for her exact reasoning, and maybe do a mock setup. These tanks usually look bigger when they are not in the environment they intend to stay in. Cutting the tank is going to be disastrous. The bottom of that size of a tank is Tempered, which will end with the bottom shattering into a million little cubes when cut. And tempered glass is quite a bit more expensive than non tempered glass. You might be able to sell that tank and replace it with a couple smaller ones.