had a heart to heart chat with wife. not going to get into details, but I think we found middle ground.
I will bring the 125 back in and start over with it, but not in the living room. What that other room will be I am not sure yet. Maybe entrance to house or bedroom. That we have not decided, but somewhere it will be in the house, the main reason she does not want it in the living room is because that where we like to entertain and does not want to make that room have the tank.
Also going to setup tank still in the laundry room as q tank. So with that being said should I still go with 40B or should I get 2 20s?
I want to thank everyone for the advise as it made me really think about the situation and how unfair it is. So I think we have found middle ground. I will need to get all new plants which sucks, mostly starting over, but I will make it work with low tech lights.