Sounds like they are doing great. The females know what to do to avoid getting attacked by the males. If she is ready to spawn, the encounter will go much diffrently. I don't really buy into the they are not a match theory. The apisto species that this might be true for are panduro and nijsenni and I haven't worked with them myself. One thing we can say is the female is not ready to spawn. It could be that the enviornmental cues are not there for her to want to spawn (temperature, pH, photoperiod, ect ect) ,but also the females only spawn every 30-40 days, and that is only if she is in the right conditions, and has had enough food to ripen the eggs. I'd say check your params to what other people are using to breed them, feed them really well with a mix of frozen and prepared foods and give it some time. Also, your females could still be immature.
Which species did you end up getting?