I run a 2215 on my 45G. I have fish that prefer less current so I really didn't want to go with the bigger better approach. I find that with my current plant level and having a CO2 reactor and a heater in line on the return side the flow is perfect. I can even reduce the flow some and it'll be fine.
As far as I know Eheim measures their flow rates with media in the filter whereas other companies do not. This is why you will see comparable Eheim filters with lower gph values.
Per Eheim you can use the ball valves on the quick connects to reduce the flow. So I would go with a 2213/2215 and just reduce the flow if you find it too much. You can also widen the holes on the spray bar to keep the same gph but reduce the water movement.