Wow, that's a lot of replies already, thanks everyone. I'll try to make a general response to all.
I started playing about 15 years ago, but haven't been playing as much recently, mainly because of the noise issue. I have a '95 American Telecaster with 11-52 strings going through a '77 Ampeg B-25B and a home made 2x15" cab which sounds incredible, but is much too loud. I also have a 15 watt little all tube Crate combo, but it doesn't sound good through my headphones or it's 10" speaker. Plug it into the 2x15, again, great, but too loud.
I'm strictly rhythm, I don't make it cry or sing, so I don't need a really fast action. The Tele sings on her own, she makes me sound better than I am.
You may ask, why does he have this stuff if he can't play it? Well, I was in a couple garage bands and we practiced in places where we could be loud. Actually I was the singer for one, and played bass in the other, I also have a Korean Danelectro DC bass. The action is horrible on that one, but the tone is so sweet.
I could get some high-end headphones I guess, mine are OK, though it would also be nice to have an acoustic guitar
A dreadnought would probably be ok, I don't think it would be too loud for most of the time as my apartment is in an old house with four units. Only one apartment is a concern, he likes it quiet. But a dreadnought will probably be the kind of tone I want.
I'll definately do some research on all the guitar models suggested, and hopefully there is someplace nearby or in the Twin Cities where I can get one. I don't want to buy a guitar without playing it first, and to make sure it is solid.
Thanks again everyone!